11th April, 2023

Why Can’t I Say No

With Rachel Morris

Dr Rachel Morris

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On this episode

Too often, we say yes to every request and every demand, even when it’s not what we want. It’s not about people-pleasing. It’s about your values. But ask yourself, is it worth it? Is sacrificing your peace and well-being a worthy cost of validating your internal dialogue?

In a world that applauds the grind, learning to say no will keep you grounded. Setting boundaries helps you care for yourself. When you care for yourself, you can look after others to the best of your ability.

In this quick dip episode, we uncover the root of the problem of our struggle with saying no. We flesh out the people-pleasing tendencies and internal shame around setting boundaries. Your value does not equate to how hard you work and how much you give yourself to other people. Set yourself free from the internal stories and scripts you’re telling yourself. Once you do, you can get clear on what truly matters.

If you want to know how to start saying yes to yourself, stay tuned to this episode.

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Reasons to listen

  1. Uncover the two myths about people pleasing.
  2. Discover the heart of why we struggle to set boundaries and say no
  3. Learn strategies that will help you start saying no without guilt and shame.

Episode highlights

00:00

On People Pleasing

00:58

Why We Struggle to Say No

04:31

Feeling Shame in Setting Boundaries

07:05

How to Start Saying No

10:55

Your Value

Episode transcript

Dr. Rachel Morris: Whenever I ask people why they struggle to say no, people will always say to me, “I’m such a people pleaser. It’s dreadful. I know I shouldn’t do it, but I just do.” They blame their inability to say no and they struggle with boundaries on people pleasing. Now, I think there are two myths about people pleasing, number one is that there are some people who are people pleasers and there are some people who aren’t, actually we’re all people pleasers. Because as I’ve talked about a million times, our Amygdalas have kept us safe since…

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