How to Say Yes When No isn’t an Option

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Sometimes, saying no just feels impossible, like we’re going against our values or risking relationships. Especially in healthcare, where helping others defines so much of what we do, saying no can seem unthinkable. But saying yes all the time can overwhelm us and lead to resentment.

But if we pause, understand our real motivations, and set clear boundaries, we can say yes in a way that works for everyone, without overloading ourselves or compromising our wellbeing.

Overcommitting often leads to burnout, resentment, and treating others poorly despite our best intentions. It’s not sustainable, and it’s not fair to us or the people relying on us.

In this quick dip, Rachel outlines how you can take a beat, and look for ways to turn a begrudging yes into something that protects your time and boundaries.

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More episodes of You Are Not a Frog:

What Will Your Future Self Thank You For? – Episode 189
How Do You Say No When Someone Might Die? – Episode 193
How to Protect Yourself from the Guilt of Saying No – Episode 265

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Reasons to listen

To identify and reframe unhelpful motivations behind saying yes
For practical strategies to set boundaries and say a sustainable, differentiated yes instead of an automatic, wholehearted one
To explore the positive reasons for saying yes while protecting your energy and time

Episode highlights

00:02:17

The wholehearted yes

00:03:19

What a begrudging yes looks like

00:05:11

The differentiated yes

00:06:48

Different types of yesses

00:09:03

Positive reasons for saying yes

00:13:33

What’s the cost of saying yes?

00:14:24

Will future-you thank past-you?

00:14:57

Reframing a shadow yes

00:16:13

Reframes for a boundaried adn sustainable yes

00:18:53

Finding a negotiated yes

Episode transcript

[00:00:00] Rachel: The other day I met my teenage daughter at the station. I had been in town and I was going to cycle home with her. So we got on our bikes and I noticed that she wasn’t wearing a helmet. In fact, it was dangling off her handlebars. Yep, a lot of good there, isn’t it? [00:00:13] Rachel: So I said to her, can you put any helmet, please? And she said, no. And I said, but we’ve talked about this. We’ve talked about the fact that you know, your brain is really important. You need to look…