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30th September, 2025

Clear and Direct is Better than Hinting and Hoping

With Rachel Morris

Dr Rachel Morris

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On this episode

If you’ve ever sent an email asking for something “ASAP” only to get a response a fortnight later, or said “I’ll see if I can” when you wanted to say “I’m too busy!”, you likely thought you were protecting the other person’s boundaries or feelings.

But the truth is, we often use this kind of communication to protect ourselves from being thought badly of.

When we’re direct about our needs, expectations, and boundaries, we prevent misunderstandings and build trust. As Brené Brown says, “Clear is kind, unclear is unkind”.

In this quick dip episode, Rachel offers ways we can communicate with more clarity by

  • identifying what we really want instead of softening our messaging
  • writing short but polite emails rather than long-winded requests
  • stating boundaries directly rather than hoping others will understand

None of us is a mind reader, so when we expect others to intuit our needs, they inevitably get it wrong. This can lead to missed deadlines, trampled boundaries, and growing resentment. What we think protects others from discomfort actually denies them the respect of honest feedback.

Remember that clarity isn’t rude or bossy; it’s respectful and ultimately turns down the heat for everyone.

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Reasons to listen

  • To learn how to communicate directly without being seen as rude, bossy, or selfish
  • To discover practical techniques for writing clear emails and setting boundaries that others will respect
  • To understand why hedging, hinting and hoping damages relationships and how clarity actually strengthens them

Episode highlights

00:00:59

We need to talk about clarity

00:04:59

Why we avoid clarity

00:07:59

Nobody can read minds

00:11:49

Negative feedback is a gift

00:13:21

Let your yes be your yes and your no be your no

00:16:50

Are you hedging, hinting, or hoping?

00:19:05

Red flags in your communication

00:20:00

How to write clear and kind emails

00:21:21

What to say instead of hedging

00:22:07

Get clear with yourself

Episode transcript

[00:00:00] Rachel: Have you ever emailed the rest of the team saying, yeah, that’s interesting, we should talk to so-and-so about that, only six weeks later to find that nobody has done anything at all. Or what about when a friend asks you, do you want to come along to this talk with me? And you know that night you really need to be in, but you say, oh, it sounds interesting, let me have some more details. They take it as a yes, you think you’ve said no, and then the night comes and they text you and say,…

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